


The Faster You Shake

by creampuffer



Category: Star Trek RPF
Genre: Crack, M/M, PWP
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-02-12
Updated: 2011-02-12
Packaged: 2017-10-19 13:14:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,571
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/201244
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/creampuffer/pseuds/creampuffer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Zach catches Chris using a Shake Weight.  And gets turned on.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Faster You Shake

It had been  Chris  who’d called him up, inviting Zach over for a low key night of Scrabble and wine.   Chris  who said he’d leave the door unlocked and to just come on in if he didn’t answer because that probably meant he had his hands full with supplies, or like, was probably taking a piss.  

So imagine Zach’s surprise when, after ringing, then knocking, and finally opening the front door with a tentative “hello?” Chris was nowhere to be found.  

Zach checked the living room, ducked his head into the kitchen and noticed the open and empty bathroom. Which only left one place for Chris to be.  His bedroom, somewhere Zach had yet to venture into since their friendship started.  But Zach thought he heard muffled sounds through the door.

And just  why  was the door closed when Chris was expecting him?

Zach knocked and waited.  No response.  Which was just plain  rude , really, and annoying because he was 99.9% sure Chris was in there.  Where else could he be, right?

A turn of the knob and the barest of pushes had the door creaking open.  He didn’t want to surprise Chris.  Especially not if Chris was just happening out of the shower.  Wet.  In a towel.  Okay, on second thought maybe Zach wouldn’t mind surprising Chris like that.

Even with the noisy door - and really Chris should invest in some WD40 for that - there was no call of  I’ll be right there.  And so Zach pushed the door open even further and stepped inside.

He’d like to think he’d have kept his eyes from wandering and hands from roving over all the trinkets - seriously Chris had a lot of, uh, shit - that littered the desks, shelves and night stand.  But that would’ve been a lie.  Zach totally would’ve nosed around Chris’ stuff, except...Except he was too distracted by  Chris.

The man’s bare back was to Zach, shoulders tense and body almost pulsing.  Not to mention the shine on all that naked skin, as if Chris was exerting quite the effort.  And Zach realized Chris’ right arm was -  oh my God.

“Chris, what are you doing?”

Zach was ignored in favor of that arm moving, jerking purposely and he wondered how Chris was staying so focused to the task at hand, blocking out Zach’s now incessant, almost-chant of  Chris, Chris, Chris.

Then Zach noticed the white cords hanging from Chris’ ears and wondered  does he have porn on his iPod?

Must have, judging by the grunts and other noisy exhalations coming from Chris’ mouth.  They were kind of obscene - Zach would’ve said they were full  on if not for the lack of visual on Chris’ equally obscene mouth - and Zach wondered what it would be like to be hit with the  need so acutely all that could be done was to sit down and jack off.  

It was dirty, yet almost decadent, and Zach’s cock twitched at the thought of not just doing it but witnessing it from a better angle. 

He was so lost in his little fantasy, that Zach didn’t notice Chris shift and turn his head a little to the left - only to do a violent double take - and pull out one ear bud.

“Fuck, Zach! You trying to scare the shit outta me or what?”

And Zach could only gape helplessly as Chris began to rise.

Didn’t Chris care that Zach was about to see...

But Chris wasn’t completely naked. Nor was his cock out, hard, flushed, and leaking from the need to come.  No, other than that goddamn bulge he always seemed to be sporting, Chris was all tucked in to athletic shorts and holding -

“What is that?”  Zach pointed to the dumbbell in Chris’ hand.

“Oh, this?”  Chris blushed a shade darker than his already flushed exercise face.  “Katie got this for me for Christmas. It’s the Shake Weight.  Figured I’d try it out, see if it’s as amazing as the infomercials claim.”

“Huh?”

“I know it’s embarrassing.  I mean, these types of things never work.”  Chris set the thing down on his bed.  “Only, what if it did?  Have you seen the guys on those commercials, Zach?”

“No...”

“Ripped,” Chris continued as if Zach hadn’t said a word.  “What I wouldn’t give to have a body like that from something as easy as...”  Chris ran his hands all along his arms, stopping at those already impressive biceps.  Zach found himself jealous of those hands, practically feeling up Chris’ body.

He realized he’d been silent for too long when Chris coughed - a note of confusion coloring the forced hack - and slipped on an old Berkley shirt.

“So is it working?”

“Dunno.  Just tried it today.  We’ll see I guess.”

Zach definitely wanted to test the results, that was for sure.

\--

A few days later Zach had two cups of coffee and his super duper - seriously J.J used those exact words - secret Trek script in his hands as he made his way to Chris’ door.

Zach’d be lying if he didn’t admit to hoping he’d find Chris with the Shake Weight out again.  So once again Zach rang, waited a few seconds then went to knock and -

Chris flung open the door with a huge grin and ruffled hair, wearing that goddamn red plaid shirt that had Zach entertaining lumberjack fantasies -  how much wood could a Chris Pine suck if a Chris Pine could suck wood? 

Oh Christ.

“Got it, then?”

Wood?  Well, yeah...

“Right here.”  Zach lifted his arms and tried to shake off the inappropriate thoughts. “Let me in Pine.”  Why did Chris have to have a tree name?  Pine...wood...It was all a cosmic joke being played on him.

They settled down on the couch, drinking and reading through the portion of the script that contained  the  scene.

“The Trekkies will love it.”  Chris grabbed at Zach’s right hand.

“What?”

And then Zach watched Chris squeeze said hand and pull it to him. Only to have his fingers pressing to Chris’ stubbled jaw, cheek.  “My mind to your mind...or however it goes.”

Zach could only blink at Chris, bright blue eyes clear and full of excitement and anticipation and...Zach was feeling a little too intense over their false Trek fawning.

“Yeah.  So...”  he searched for something to distract him as he pulled his hand away from Chris’ face.  “How’s the Shake Weight?”

Chris blinked and Zach swore all expression disappeared from those eyes for a few seconds before he responded. 

“Oh. Right.  Meh.  It’s only been a few days.  But I’m pretty sore.”  Chris started up that self rub down thing again and Zach shifted nervously next to him.  “What do you think?  Looking good or what?”

Chris flexed and somehow managed to look all beefy - in the best kind of way - even with the plaid covering up those  arms.

“Well,” Zach hedged.  What to say?

“I know it doesn’t seem like a real work out.  I was, and still am, kind of skeptical.  But it feels like it.”

Zach was beginning to regret his choice of topic when Chris stood up and began unbuttoning his shirt.  And yet, he couldn’t help but get a little excited at viewing Chris with less clothes on.  

“Um.”

“Have you seen how it works?”

“Kind of.”  If you counted YouTubing the commercials.  Which, to be honest, didn’t improve Zach’s opinion on the validity of the product.  But it was kind of sexy to see all that...

“So you hold it like this.”  Chris had managed to strip off his undershirt too and pull the Shake Weight out from God only knew where while Zach’s mind had been occupied.  “And turn it on.”

The weight gave off a tiny hum as it pumped.  And thank God for that - it covered up the hum of approval that slipped past Zach’s lips as he watched.

“It’s supposed to target more muscle groups than just regular weight lifting.”

Zach’s mouth may have popped open at the sight of all those muscles rippling.  Jiggling.  Bouncing.  No part of Chris’ upper body was immune to the Shake Weight.  Even Chris’ pecs were dancing.  Up and down.  Zach’s eyes followed every move.  Enraptured.

And if he groaned?  Well, it couldn’t be helped.

Chris grunted a few times as both hands wrapped around the weight. It was too much.  Too much for Zach to take.  Not just the sight, but the sound of Chris.  The completely nonsexual act turning Zach on more than it had any right to.

And when tiny beads of sweat broke out along Chris’ hair line and chest, slowly running down his body, Zach had the near impossible-to-control impulse to lick up the salty taste of Chris.

He didn’t quite manage to keep from licking his lips, though.

“And that’s pretty much it.”  Chris turned it off and made to set the Shake Weight down on the coffee table.  Only he stilled and winced.  And before Zach could worry Chris had managed to find a way to hurt himself with a Shake Weight of all things, Zach stared in wonderment as Chris  adjusted  himself.

“Uh.”  Articulate as ever.

“Sorry.  It’s all the vibrations.  Sometimes gets me crazy hard while I use it.”

Me too.

As if reading his mind, Chris’ eyes wandered down to Zach’s crotchal area.  Which was a really bad thing.  The yoga pants he had on did nothing to hide hard ons.

“Zach?”  And of course Chris had to be socially unskilled enough to call Zach out.  “Is that what I think it is?”

“Sympathy Boner?”  He blurted out the first, and stupidest, thing that came to mind.  “Yeah, see, all that shaking just looked like it could, um, cause...an...erection?”

Cleary Zach’s brain was taking a time out, all the blood used to keep sounding sane having found its way to Zach’s painfully hard cock.  

He spun on his heel, not bothering to grab his script - to hell with J.J. and his over caffeinated rants - and quickly walked, not ran nope, out of Chris’ place.

Sympathy boner.  Had he really said that to Chris?  Fuck his life.

\--

Zach totally expected Chris to avoid him after that debacle.  So when, a week of no communication from Chris came and went, Zach tried to tell himself it was no big deal.  But it kind of was.  Because even if Zach more than lusted over Chris, he was first and foremost a friend.  Zach missed his  friend.

Especially on nights when he was alone and bored and needing someone to compete with over who could answer more Cash Cab questions correctly.  Something he and Chris did regularly.  And that he needed that evening.

At first he missed the doorbell ringing, the sound of his self pity unbearably loud and drowning out all else.  But then the bell rang again, shrill and long, to where Zach couldn’t ignore it - willingly or accidentally - so he got up and trudged to the door.

He opened the door a few inches.  “Yes?”

“Hey, Quinto.”

Zach really needed to install a peephole.

“Pine.”  he didn’t open the door wider, didn’t step out of the way to let Chris - who’s hands were contritely placed behind his back - in.  Just stood there, feeling wronged even though he’d been the one to make things uncomfortable by getting wood right in front of Mr. Best Friend Who Doesn’t Swing That Way.

“You forgot your script.”  From behind his back Chris produced the thick manilla envelope.

“I did.”  He didn’t move, a little too scared - though he’d never admit to it - to take the thing.

“So I thought I’d give it back.”

“...a week later.”

He hadn’t meant to say it so loud, mumble it really.  But judging by Chris’ wince, he’d said it plenty loud.  “Can I come in?”

Zach was on the verge of saying no and slamming the door shut in that beautiful face so he could nurse his injured pride in private.  But then Chris gave him the  look.   It was more than a pout, more than puppy dog eyes.  It was all  Chris.   His face saying he knew the look got him what he wanted from whoever he unleashed that power on.  Yet still managing to look so adorable and sincere.  Fuck but Zach was a sucker for that look.

“Oh all right.”

“Yess.”  Chris dragged out the “s” as he shoved past Zach.  Which was when Zach noticed what else Chris had behind his back.

“What the fuck kind of joke is this, Chris?”

“Oh, this?”  Chris had the good grace to look ashamed and blushed as he turned the Shake Weight over in his hands.

“Yeah.  That.”  Zach, angry and embarrassed, stormed into his kitchen for a glass of water to hopefully drown himself in.

“Well, you see...Katie and I have this bet going.”  Zach saw blue eyes dart back and forth between the weight and Zach’s face.

“Keep going,” he added when Chris seemed to stall out.

“A bet, about the Shake Weight.  And its, ah, effectiveness.”  Zach quirked an eyebrow at that.  “I told her it was definitely working for me but she swears up and down I’m full of it.”

Chris, who had been standing almost shyly in the doorway to the kitchen, strode forward until he was at arm’s length from Zach.

“What’s that got to do with me?”

“I was hoping you could settle the bet for us.”  A tentative smile tugged at those pink lips.

“How?”

One of Chris’ stupidly hot hands scratched idly at the side of his neck.  “Use it?”

Zach stared dumbfounded for a few seconds.  “But just once won’t prove anything.”

“Let’s just say if all goes according to plan, this will happen a lot more than once.”  Chris thrust out the stupid weight.

“Oh...kay?”  And Zach took it, still feeling weird by the situation.

He turned it on and felt the strangest surge shoot up his arm.

“No.  You gotta take off your shirt.”

Zach turned it off.  “Why?”

“Just trust me.”

And Zach did.  So he listened.  He tugged off his shirt and set it down on the counter, not wanting Harold to take that as an open invitation for using it as a blanket.  He did not want cat hair all over his shirt.  

“So I just hold it, right?”

“Yess.”  And there was that drawn out “s” sound again.  Confusing, given the situation, really.

The Shake Weight went on again and the surging sensation spread even farther the longer Zach held it up.  Up his arm, over his shoulders, in his chest and up his neck.  Until his teeth were almost clanking together annoyingly.  He didn’t like this Shake Weight thing.  And hell, his arm was getting tired.     
  
What the hell, did this thing actually work?

So he held it with both hands, held it out from his chest to try and dampen the shocks to his muscles.  But his arms grew tired and he tugged it in close until it was touching his sternum and vibrating painfully - kind of pleasurably - against his skin.

And yeah he felt himself harden the longer he used it.  He totally got why Chris had sprung one from using it.  Of course, that didn’t excuse his dick from popping up that time he hadn’t been the one using the weight -to say hello.  

Oh Hello.

Thinking of cocks and Chris naturally led to Zach looking down at Chris’ nether regions and...

“Dude.”

Zach turned it off and made a face at Chris’ more than substantial bulge.

“I totally get the Sympathy Boner now.”

“Ah, right then.”  Sympathy boner meaning Chris wasn’t actually turned on or anything.  

“Because,” and Chris was stepping closer.  Which made Zach step back, until he was backed up against the kitchen island, and Chris was so close - way too close if he valued his heterosexuality.  “My cock is pretty much crying from looking but not touching.  The poor thing.”  And Chris palmed his dick through his pants.

“Chris, what’s going on?”  The Shake Weight thunked noisely on the counter as his hands sought out something stable to hold on to.  Because this was not real.  Couldn’t be.  And Zach felt dizzy he was so turned on from just seeing Chris do that.

“Shut up, Zach.”  Now Chris was in his face.  And he could feel warm and smell mint as Chris’ words ghosted over his lips.  “I’m gonna kiss you now.”

Chris surged up to Zach’s slightly parted lips, pressing long, languorous kisses.  His tongue lazily licked over the cupid’s bow of Zach’s upper lip, making Zach shake and press harder into the kiss.  Then that tongue pushed insistently into Zach’s mouth and he found he couldn’t hold back the guttural noise Chris seemed to practically  suck right from his lungs. Not with a kiss like that.  And definitely not when Chris’ hands were running up and down all along Zach’s exposed chest while he kissed.

“Oh God.”

Chris had moved on to nip at Zach’s jaw, until he worked over to his ear.  Zach shuddered as a wet tongue licked along the shell of his ear and nearly jumped on Chris when he felt a cool stream of air hit it.

Zach was letting out a string of obscenities and nonsensical words as Chris continued to roam his body with lips, tongue, and teeth.  They were currently worrying Zach’s clavicle, licking the hollow of his throat, and reducing him to a quivering mess.

He was so distracted by what Chris was doing with his mouth that he missed what Chris was doing with his hands, working Zach’s pants open until a broad, hot hand was wrapping around his dick and pulling him out.  Only to stroke firm, hard, and slow.

“Chris.”

“Yeah?”

“Want you.”

“Yess.”  That drawn out “s” sound was so sexy.  Especially since Chris’ hand sped up as he answered.

Zach had never had anyone touch him so good. So right.  In a way Zach hadn’t even been aware of wanting.  Chris’ strong hand fisted tightly around Zach’s shaft and  squeezed, tugged, twisted and - Jesus - thumbed his slit.   All at once.  Damn but Chris gave good hand jobs.

Zach was shaking, feeling his balls draw up tight and clenching his teeth to hold off his orgasm.  It was too good to end.  Because who knew when, or if, it would happen again?  Maybe it was just a one time deal because Chris felt sorry for him?

“Hey.”  The word was a quiet whisper against Zach’s ear, a sweet contradiction to the rough hand on his dick.  “Watch me.”

His eyes traveled down Chris’ chest, over his arms; bicep and forearm tight and strained, veins popping as Chris exerted effort in maintaining the maddening pace.  It had to be uncomfortable for Chris, the angle was all weird and it was such a fast speed Zach thought Chris couldn’t keep going for much longer.  But a quick glance at Chris’ face told Zach he wasn’t in pain, wasn’t tired.  In fact, Chris looked blissed out, blue eyes electric and tongue darting out over those luscious lips he’d imagined so many times around his cock.

Zach threw his head back and groaned, “so close.”

“Good.  Want you to come for me, Zach.”

He felt a sting of pain as Chris bit his neck, right at the pulse point.  And as Chris’ tongue licked a long stripe up the column, soothing the hurt, Zach shouted and spilled himself all over Chris’ hand.

\--

Chris managed to drag a boneless Zach to the bedroom, pants sagging off his hips.  He felt a little foolish, half naked and spent cock softening against his belly.  And all while Chris was fully clothed.  And fully hard.

“Shit, Chris.  Lemme -” He reached out a feeble hand as he sat on the bed.

“Why don’t you rest up for a minute?  Then you can take care of me.”  Chris kissed him, surprisingly sweetly and  right  until Zach was smiling against his lips.

They lay in comfortable silence, Zach getting drowsy.  But he didn’t want to sleep.  Not until Chris got off.

“Fuck, man.  That was the best hand job I have ever gotten.”  

Chris’ smile was all teeth.  “Excellent.  It’s safe to say, then, that I won the bet.”

Confused, Zach managed to roll to his side to better see Chris.  “The bet?”

“Yup.  Katie said it wasn’t benefiting me any.  But I’m pretty sure that Shake Weight is responsible for the jerk off of your entire existence.”

Zach barked out a surprised laugh at Chris’ words, that self satisfied, smug look becoming more and more endearing to him.

“It proves it was worth the money.  Keep using it.  Every day.  And maybe...”  Zach felt his cheeks redden as he forced himself to say the next words.  “If you ever need someone to, ya know, test your results again, I’m always up for it.”

He managed to work up enough courage to look at Chris.  And was surprised and pleased to see Chris grinning like a madman.  

“Like I said, Zach.  If all goes according to plan -”

“Did it?”  Zach didn’t want to dare to assume but...

“Oh yes.  So I hope you’re okay with repeat performances.”

He was so okay with it.  So okay with more than that happening.  And to show that, he leaned over and kissed Chris until they were both breathless.


End file.
